My Body Can't Keep up with my Brain

 

Brain:  Good morning, Body!  Look at the beautiful day God has given us today!  And we got plenty of sleep last night, so we're rarin' to get going!  Isn't this great?  Are you ready to do your finger stick now?

Body:  Could you just SHUT UP and let me get my eyes open so I can actually view the weather for myself?  And, if you don't mind, I'd like to pee before you rush me into the whole "finger stick" thing!  Man, I just need some coffee!

Brain:  Well, alright - but hurry it up!  We have lots of stuff to do today.  We have to do the finger stick and take our meds and feed the dog and get some laundry done.  Oh... and we really need to change the sheets on the King size bed this time.  Now, I know, Body, you're not always feeling real swift about doing that whole sheet-changing thing, but you know, it just has to be done this week!  Then we need to get some dusting done, 'cuz you know somebody wrote a message in the dust on the dresser here in the master bedroom again...

Body:  You totally exhaust me, you know that?

Brain:  Well, I've always tried to be just as patient with you as I can, but honestly, Body, I think you're getting slower every year!  You just really need to pick up the pace to keep up with me.  Maybe you need more vitamins, or yoga, or a good swift kick in the...

Body:  Bite me, Brain.

Brain:  Now see, that's precisely the attitude I'm talking about.  You really need to improve your outlook on life - like me!

Body:  Look, Brain - I'm the one who has to feel the pain when I move - not you.  It would be really special if you would quit sending pain signals to my achy joints and especially to my right leg where the neuropathy and sciatica are!  Wow, sometimes that sciatica is a real pain in the... well - the leg! 

Brain:  The word "leg" was not your first thought - I know, because I'm the one who thought it! 

Body:  Yeah, sometimes I forget I can't fool you.  That's too bad!

Brain:  So, can we walk away from the coffee pot now and start doing a little housework?  We could start out slowly.  Hey, let's start out by going downstairs to see what's up on facebook?

Body:  Hey, that's a winner.  All this other junk can wait a little while.  I think I can drag myself down the stairs to the computer!  Thanks for the idea, Brain!

Brain:  Oh, no problem.  Just doing my job!  Hey, Body - don't forget your coffee!

Body:  Ah yeah... thanks!  Hey - I think this might be a great day after all!

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Yeah - They're Coming to Take me Away!!!

http://youtu.be/_HZq62nqE78

Today is SHOPPING REMINDER DAY!!!!!!!!!!!  The day that reminds us to begin doing our Christmas shopping!!!  To those of you who love to shop, this is a great day to celebrate and you will do so at the mall.  For the rest of us, it's the day we roll our eyes and make sad faces and say, "Oh, if I have to!"  Either way - enjoy!